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Find Support, Healing and Joy in Essential Oils and AromaDance

Interview with Tamara Gerlach

Where do you find the support, healing and joy that we all need, when you live alone and feel alone too?

I was surprised to discover that Essential Oils and AromaDance not only could help in this regard but can assist in a powerful transformation and enrichment on all levels of our existence. The discovery took place during the enlightening conversation I had with Tamara Gerlach, founder of AromaDance. Listen in!

Download transcript, keynotes and links here



Tamara’s  website


Recommended brand of essential oils


Cultivating Radiance



Free e-book

Chakras made simple


Halina (H):       Hi everyone. Halina here from Solo Souls net. And thanks for listening in. The background for the conversation we’re going to have today is a little story… A while ago, April Joy Ford, who among many other amazing things is the author of a book titled, You Are Not Alone, suggested that I include aroma therapy in the work I do helping women overcome loneliness and find joy. And my first reaction was that, ‘Well, that sounds interesting, except I know almost nothing about aroma therapy.’ But then I realized that I know someone who is a true expert in that arena. And who is the creator of her own modality called, AromaDance. And who is also an incredibly inspiring woman. Her name is Tamara Gerlach, and she is the best selling author of “Cultivating Radiance”. That’s how I met her, by the way, when I read the book. She’s also a gym owner, speaker, essential oil educator, and she walks the Priestess Path. Her life is dedicated to guiding and serving people with ease and delight as they create freedom, open to grace, and connect to the wholeness of divine love. She is currently launching “Living in the Beauty Field” as a free course and “And The Men Came Running” as part of her Divine Body Wisdom series, which will be available this summer at Robby Rice’s Be Who You Are Academy. Going back to the book, in Cultivating Radiance, Tamara wrote, “As my outside ages, my intention is to become stunningly beautiful on the inside”. And I’m so glad that she said yes to sharing her beauty and her wisdom and experience with us today. So welcome Tamara and thank you for being here!

Tamara (T):     Oh, thank you so much, Halina. I love talking to you, and I am so glad that after so many years we get to reconnect and play together with the oils too.

H:                     Yes! I’m so excited about it. So why don’t we dive right into it? Because as you can hear, I know nothing about it. And I would like to know… What is aromatherapy and how does it work?

T:                     So basically, essential oils are volatile liquids. We call them oils, but a true clean essential oil isn’t oily at all. It actually evaporates quite quickly. Sometimes quicker than water. It comes from the plants. So if you can imagine like when you crush a mint leaf or twist a lemon rind, do you know the little spurts or the scents that you’re releasing? That is actually a little sack the plant develops so that it actually is there to protect the plant from things like bacteria and viruses and all kinds of predators to the plant. And the sacs when they pop, they release the essential oil. And that’s what we actually harvest from the plant. So what we’re getting is the protection, but also a bit of the plant’s spirit. We like to say the blood of the plant. So as we use them, it has the same effects in our body. So whether it’s using them aromatically like just breathing it in… Topically, you can put it on your skin… And we should talk more about that. Like some you must dilute because they’re very hot. They’re very intense…  And then some of them you can actually take internally. And I want to put a caveat here. You want to be extremely careful with internal use. I would not go down to your local store and just grab an oil and go, ‘Hey, I think I’ll drink this.’ You want to make sure that you’re getting an absolutely pure mixture that you know it’s been tested because a lot of oils– most of the oils on the market have been adulterated in some way. That just means that it’s been cut with something, like diluted with carrier oil or something. And sometimes they use perfumes as well because apparently some people think that the plant doesn’t smell good enough, so they add perfumes in. And it also makes it cheaper for them so that they can sell something for…  Anyway.

But the other thing that you also want to think about when you’re doing it internally is what it is because when we’re taking the energy in internally, we want to make sure that we’re doing it in a way that is very conscious. So whether you’re breathing it or taking it topically as well, you want to make sure that you’re very conscious about how you’re using it. Does that help?

H:                     Definitely. Definitely. Well, I get the impression– I have a sense that there’s so much, and we can only touch the surface.

T:                     Right.

H:                     But I think I get the sense of it. So there’s the essence of the plant and there’s also how we use it, right?

T:                     Right. And they all have because they’re such an energy. We’re literally taking an energy from the plant. They have their physical aspects. Like I said they’re protective– Often antibacterial, antiviral, anti fungal; things like this. But they also have an emotional aspect, and we can understand that because… you’ll notice when you walk into a room, you’ll have a certain scent. Like if you walk into someone’s house and it smells like how your grandmother used to cook. It’ll take you right immediately back to that memory. There’s an emotional response to smells. And then there’s the other side of that, and sometimes you smell something and you’re like, ‘Ugh, I can’t stand the smell of that.’ And it’s more than a physical reaction, it’s like, ‘Ugh.’ So we can get the gist of how they work emotionally just by our reactions that way. But they also work in very subtle ways. And that’s where I like to play.

H:                     Yes. But that’s—My curious mind goes there… . So my curious mind starts wondering, so—Because see when you use these examples… I know that there are… I have noticed that there are certain smells that I like one day and don’t another. So just like with colors– I don’t know why, but one day I would prefer one color and another day another color. But since this also seems to be a science… It seems like besides our subjective experience, is this also something objective where you could say, ‘This oil or this plant has this effect.’? And how do we know that?

T:                     Yeah. So there are different aspects to the oils. There are different alcohols that are natural. Minerals. And different chemical compounds, and they have an actual cellular reaction in our bodies. So when you’re using them– Something like lavender. … That is going to really help calm your nervous system. It’s biological. But also the scents. We know that every time you go into a spa they are always using lots of lavender because it is naturally very calming. And the science of it is pretty deep and pretty intense, and I don’t want to bore your listeners.  But here’s a good way to think about it. This is how I help people get the feel of what an oil will do on that sort of emotional, physical sense is..You think about how it grows. Like something like vetiver. And vetiver is a grass. And when we get the oil, it comes from the roots. And the roots you think of– They’re very deep. They’re in the earth. You think of roots of grass. They look like nerves. And so vetiver is a great oil for helping you get rooted. Helping you ground your energy. And it calms your nervous system. It calms your nerves.

T:                     And then you think of something maybe opposite like a lemon on a tree. That’s bright yellow, and it’s supper happy, and big, and bright, and putting itself out there. And that’s how lemon makes you feel. It’s very uplifting. All of our citrus oils… You know oranges, think of the same thing. Bright orange on a tree. It’s like, ‘Wow, wow.’ And that’s the kind of energy your feel. It’s always uplifting and happy. And then something like a lavender, you think of wispy. You know how lavender grows on a long stalk. And imagine it blowing in the wind. And it’s very graceful, and soft, and calming. And that’s how it makes you feel. So I just tell people think about how it grows and that’s often that is how it makes you feel.

H:                     That makes sense. So along these lines– Because one question– I have like—Yeah, I have many questions as you can imagine. So I’m asking you two at that the same time. That’s not a good idea, but let me just express them. So one question is how potent, how significant is it to work with these things?

I’m giving you both questions, and then it’s up to you to mix it–if you’re fine with that.

T:                     Sure, sure.

H:                     And then the other question is let’s say– Speaking more specifically on behalf of my audience. So let’s say that you feel lonely, or you feel really down, or you have regrets about your past, or you feel empty, or you feel really sad because you have no company. No one to talk to… How can working with essential oils come into play?

H:                            That’s a lot of questions at the same time, but you can just do what you prefer…

T:                     Yeah. And I do guess that there is a flow to that for sure. So the intensity to start with. They can be very intense. And it depends on your sensitivity, so that’s how I would start. People who are highly sensitive, which often, honestly if you’re feeling lonely, you’re probably are sensitive. Because the people who aren’t sensitive don’t feel it.

H:                     Exactly. Yes. 

T:                     So I would guess that a lot of people listening here are highly sensitive.

H:                     Definitely.

T:                     And when you are, you need very little oil. Very little oil will get you a long way. You’ll be able to simply smell just a drop or two. Just using a drop or two will completely shift you, and that part is really nice. So you don’t feel like you have to use tons of things, And the other thing is you’re not necessarily trying to fix anything. What we do is we try to harmonize with the oils. We’re not trying to necessarily change who we are but really support what we want. So if someone is feeling some negative feelings, there are oils that will go in an address the negative feeling. But also, there’s always the positive side as well. So when it addresses that negative feeling, it usually helps bring you into the opposite or the positive side of it. So for instance, if you’re feeling loneliness, frankincense is good for that. And it’s also the oil of truth. They all have their sort of emotional name too. And it’s the oil of truth. So it’s the one that also will help you feel grounded and feel into the truth of, ‘You are whole.’ ‘You are full. And the loneliness is an aspect, but it’s not who you are.’

H:                     Exactly. Exactly.

T:                     Yeah. And it’s so– Oh gosh, there’s so many great oils that I could share with you. Bergamot is one. It’s a citrus, and like I said, the citrus are very uplifting. And that’s the oil itself, acceptance. And I think that that is a huge part of whenever I feel that depression, or loneliness, or disconnection, I like to go for my bergamot. Because it’s like, ‘Oh, yeah. It’s okay. I’m not the crappy person I’m imagining myself to be right now.’ Cedarwood, that’s another one. That is– It’s the oil of community. So that’s another one that helps you feel your connection. You know frankincense— I have to go back to that. It also is a very good one to help for your connection to divine love as well. And that’s part of the truth of frankincense. Yeah, I like any of the citruses like lemon, lime, wild orange, the bergamot for sure. Wild orange is the oil of abundance, and that sometimes helps me open my heart. Oh, and you know what? Okay, I have to throw this one in too, and it’s peppermint. So if people like the smell of peppermint. It’s so invigorating and lifting. But it’s an oil of a buoyant heart. And often I will combine the peppermint and wild orange so there’s abundance and a buoyant heart. And that combination for me– I just love that one. And so whether I’m putting it in the diffuser and mixing it in my hands, or just smelling it and putting it on my body. I love that combo.

H:                     Wow. I get there’s a sense of the abundance of possibilities. And I love what you said about not fixing. I really do not believe in fixing. I believe in processes and journeys. And it sounds like this all supports the journey and supports the opening so that’s beautiful. The question that emerges in me is… Is this something that you can just experiment with on your own? I know that you recommend a certain brand of essential oils, and I will include that in the links once we publish this specific interview. But otherwise is it something that you could just experiment with, or should you get in touch with an expert? How do you get started?

T:                     Yeah, I would say yes. And yes, trust yourself. I always encourage people to use their oils intuitively. And, you need to know a few things. There are some oils that, like I said, you shouldn’t put in your body. There are some oils that are going to be hot. Like you don’t want to put clove straight on your skin or oregano. It’s like acid. It’s not like acid, but it’s very, very hot. So you want to know what you’re doing with the oil. But that is easy enough to find. So here’s what I would do is start smelling oils. Just connect with somebody who has a good high quality level of oil, or get some samples or something. Just smell them and see what you think. And we’re always drawn to certain scents. And often the ones we’re drawn to are the ones that we’re most desiring. That’s where our body is saying, ‘Give me some of that.’ Like if you love smelling Ginger. That’s the oil of empowerment. So maybe Ginger is one of your go to oils. And it needs to be diluted before you put it on your body. Everything’s fine in the diffuser, you can’t go wrong in the diffuser. But I would be careful with putting stuff right on your body, especially sensitive parts like around the ears or on the wrists. That’s very tender, thin skin where you want to be kind of careful.

H:                     That sounds so exciting. I actually didn’t plan on it, but I’m starting being really curious about it. I also like the process of… that it’s okay if you’re a little bit cautious, that you start finding out. And that just the fact that our sense of smell is so deeply connected with our physicality. And that in itself is connection. That in itself is grounding. So it sounds like a super exciting aspect of life simply.

T:                     Yeah. What I find is a lot of times people– We’ve disconnected from our body. We get so much into our heads. And using essential oils can really help to reconnect us to our body. Because I think that when we’re reconnected to our body, we have access to a lot more of our essential wisdom, basically. Because we have so much wisdom in ourselves and when we activate it through the oils, it helps to kind of bring us into a higher vibration and a higher state of awareness. So things that seem to drag us down or feel very heavy at one vibration, you start using the oils and it lightens. We get a different perspective because we just feel different.

H:                     That is so very true. And the deeper we can go the higher we can go as well. So speaking of reconnecting with body that– This brings me to the next question. And that is this thing– This modality that you have created and developed: What Is AromaDance?

H:                     Tell me all about it. Well, maybe not all about it, but just a little bit. I’m very curious…

T:                     Okay. I love it so much. I can’t even tell you how grateful I am that I got this. So I have a background in gymnastics and dance. I started gymnastics when I was 7, and I started dancing when I was 15. And I still own a gymnastics school. It has dance in it too. And that’s part of my background. But I’m also an ordained priestess, and my art– sort of where I got my master’s in priestessing is around anointing. And that’s an ancient– You know the Egyptians did anointings on people. And it’s an ancient art. And so I have that background as well. And then I am really into chakra energy. And a good friend of mine who’s now passed, Kal Malik, he and I used to really dive into the energetics of the chakra systems. And then one day, I was in Ireland and had been playing with Robin Rice, and we had done– Well, playing. I should say we were doing this shamanic work. And we had done this fire dance. It was this super intense shamanic fire dance out in the stone circle, and then she came up behind me and did this thing where she lifted me up off of my feet and arched me back. And something happened on my body. I had this release. This complete release. And I sort of was out of it after that. And then she just sort of leaned me up against this stone. And then the next day– We journeyed this night. And the next day, I was walking by this river and I got this download– My feet literally stopped. I could not walk. I could not move forward. It was like the spirit was saying to me. ‘Okay stop you’re going to need to really pay attention here.’ And this whole thing went down how it would all basically take all of my paths and bring them together. So it– AromaDance consists of free movement type ecstatic dance where you get to move as you wish in any way that your spirit or your body says, ‘Go.’ And it can get really fun and really wild, and it can get really still. It’s whatever you are feeling at the time. And we combine it with the chakras. And so we start with our root chakra, and we anoint with anoil that is a very grounding oil on our feet, on our tailbone. And then music also matches so we dance about 10 or 12 minutes to that kind of genre. That kind of rooted, grounded feeling, and it’s really just– We anoint with great intention, and then I give a question. And people get to dance out the answer to that question. And it’s all internal, so it’s not like at the end I’m like, ‘Okay, what’s the answer?’ So you get to– It’s all very freeing. And then after about maybe 10 or 12 minutes, we go on to the next chakra. The music slows down, everybody gets their next oil, we anoint the second chakra, and with that energy and that music, and that kind of intention. So we move all the way up the chakras, and then at the end I do a live activation. At the end of it, after an hour and a half of this– Well, it depends, an hour and a half to two hours of this. People are just so lit up. We smell fantastic for one thing. But we just take in each of our energy centers and completely freed it through movement, through intention, through inquiry really. Like looking like, ‘What? What really needs to happen here in this space.’ And it’s just fun. It’s really fun. People are just so lit up at the end. I just love it. It’s like I can see the most beautiful essence from everyone that does it.

H:                     That sounds fantastic!

T:                     So I highly recommend it. And not just because I made it up. I’ve got leaders all over the world now in Australia, in Europe, and all over North America. So if you want to experience it, contact me and I can help you find someone nearby.


H:                     That sounds great! So this is something that you would do with someone’s guidance, and it’s like a complete journey in itself. And it does sound fantastic, I have to say. But are there any elements that someone can use at home?

T:                     Yes. Because it’s not rocket science. It’s actually pretty simple.

                        Put on some music that you like and just start dancing. Just feel into your body because your body has so many things that it wants to say. And we’re getting so used to– In our culture, we listen to our heads so much because that’s what we get rewarded for in our culture, mostly. But you think about how we develop from our primal self. Our body was our wisdom. We were sensing everything because that’s how we survived. So we have a lot of wisdom tucked away inside of us. And by actually asking for access to that wisdom, it’s ready. It wants to come. So whenever you’re feeling stuck…. Like I know when I’m in a depressed state– Because that happens. Not super often, but it happens. And so–

H:                     We’re human.

T:                     –I just go with it. Yeah, I just go with it and go, ‘Oh, okay. Now I’m doing this.’ And I know that when you’re there, it doesn’t feel like you want to just put on music and start dancing–because that’s like, ‘I just want to go lay on my bed and cry.’ But here’s the thing, you can put on a slow piece, you can put on something– Whatever you intuitively feel like– Not that– Again, we’re not trying to fix it. But how can you go maybe even deeper into it? How could you go into the knowingness of where you are? And put on that piece of music, and then just move even gently. And sometimes it might be something that’s really ecstatic and jumping around. But asking your body what it can give you. And if you have oils, you can go ahead and anoint. Put your– If you know where the chakras are. You can put on your feet, tailbone, your sacral, below your belly button, your solar plexus, heart, throat, forehead, and top of your head. And you could anoint with different– Because that’s– In AromaDance we do a different oil for each one. Or you can do the same oil. Or you could anoint your elbows. It doesn’t matter. But the point is that you’re caring for yourself, you’re connecting with your body. You’re moving. And there is that relationship with the plant spirits. That more comes. It’s incredible how much you can open up with that relationship.

H:                     That sound amazing. I’ve done some– I love dancing, so I’ve done like a little bit of it. I do it from time to time. I just feel like dancing. I never thought about adding that element of… all the elements that you mentioned. So that in itself sounds like such a rich experience.

T:                     Yeah.

H:                     On the other hand, what I wanted to ask is– Because this sounds like a really deep process. And it’s not something that you would just do and then go to work 5 minutes after that, right? But maybe you would, I don’t know? I probably wouldn’t. But I’ve been thinking about something– And I remember that from back when I struggled with loneliness, that there are two specific periods of the day that are most challenging. And the first one is often when you wake up in the morning. Because you come from this, like, escape and then into the world, and it can feel challenging. And the other, maybe even more, is the evenings. Because if you work, then you connect with the people there, and you need it. Then you come home, and it can feel empty. And this is where when things begin to– Many people would kind of try to shut it down. Maybe numb themselves with food or with TV. And they just kind of try to survive the evenings, to use a little bit strong word, but still. And I’m wondering– Because like some of what you described sounds very intense, and some of it sounds like really soft like the way you could use the essential oils. Are there any you can recommend? Are there practices that you could do daily that would support this kind of states?

T:                     Absolutely. And this is something that I do every day. When I get out of the shower, I put coconut– fractionated coconut oil all over my body. So not the kind of coconut oil that you could cook with that is all fatty and greasy. But a fractionated coconut oil because that will just dissolve it right into your skin. I know the coconut oil I use just kind of makes– It doesn’t get on my cloths. It just kind of makes everything soft. So every inch of my body, but here’s the thing, when you put it on, don’t just slather it on and just slap it on your body. Really, as you’re putting it on your foot, or your ankle, and your leg, just really love that part of your body. Just go, ‘Oh, what a great leg. Thank you so much for letting me walk around on you for all these years. And beautiful knees. And my thighs and–’ Some people, especially women, hate their thighs, or hate their stomach, or hate their butt or whatever. Instead, we can just love it. Just go, ‘Oh god, beautiful thighs. Thank you. And oh, my stomach, you do such beautiful things for me.’ And your arms– Every part of your body, and just start by loving yourself there. And then I anoint each of my chakras and sometimes I’ll do some extra stuff. Just putting it on my wrists or behind my ears or whatever. And with each of the anointings, just have a little blessing for yourself. Especially– Even if you have only one oil. It doesn’t even matter. You can just take whatever you have. And as you’re putting on your tailbone, or your feet, or the back of your legs, ask, ‘May I be grounded today. May I be connected to the earth and the earth wisdom.’ And then as you move up to your second chakra your sacral chakra below your belly button, ‘May I be filled with creativity and abundance.’ And then moving up to your solar plexus, ‘May I be confident and really feel my power.’ And so as you’re moving through your body, and opening up your heart, and opening up your throat. And always give yourself a blessing. And your body will feel that because– Say it out loud too, unless you’re in a public shower or something. And even then, who cares, right? Just say it because people will be like, ‘Wow, she’s awesome.’ But yeah, say it out loud, hearing it. Because hearing is one of our senses. So we want to actually hear, and feel, and smell. It’s a whole sensual experience. And when you do this, you– When you leave the house or start your day, you’re going to have a completely different energy than if you woke up going, ‘My life sucks.’ Because you’ve taken on the ritual and given yourself the right to be blessed. So it’s a different way of being. And like I said, I don’t leave my house without– Because it’s wild out there. It can get crazy. And I want to make sure that I’m fully connected. And especially my crown chakra, people think, ‘Oh, I don’t put oils in my hair and make my hair all oily.’ It depends on what kinds of oils, yes. I would not go down to your local drug store, get some cheap oil that you will– It will leave a big grease spot on your head. But a good oil will just absorb right into your scalp.

H:                     That sounds wonderful. And I also loved the way you reminded me about this thing with also saying things out loud. There are some benefits of living alone, you know. You can talk, talk out loud as much as you want… And you know, there is so much talk about presence in our culture. And there is this discovery of what presence means. And presence is really– The way into presence is through all our senses. And what you described here is like a whole ritual that opens all the senses. Opens us to this connection, but also enables us to be more present throughout the day.

T:                     Absolutely.

H:                     That sounds just wonderful.

T:                     Yeah. It’s is one of those things where– So when I do my work with people and when they show up for AromaDance or really anything I do with people, I always help them, sometimes I just verbally ask for Empty Presence, if they understand what that means. But empty presence is exactly what it sounds like. It is emptying and letting go. Letting as much as you can, of course. You know the thoughts still come through. But really being able to empty the chalice. Empty the vessel that we call this body. And it’s an allowing. It’s a freedom feeling of just, ‘Okay, everything’s released.’ And then being fully present in the body. So being able to not hear all the clutter and the static that comes from our brain and all of our thoughts. ‘And I need to do this and dah, dah, dah, dah, dah, day.’ ‘Oh and I’m comparing myself to that person.’ All of that gets released, and then we can hear what’s going on in our body and in our present state. And one of the ways that I do that with people when they get to AromaDances is, I do– I anoint just their throat or their brow chakra. And then often I have my hand on their heart as well just to connect those two. Just– You can even do it to yourself right now. Just take one finger and draw circles between your eyebrows on your forehead. And you can feel how it kind of– Imagine it like a little eraser–going there and erasing all your thoughts and just letting everything be clear. It actually opens up that energy center. And that’s our center for vision, and imagination, and wisdom. And so yeah, that’s– Presence is so vital. It’s vital. Because when we’re not here. We’re not– we’re somewhere thinking about the past or somewhere out in the future, we can’t have a truly embodied experience because we’re not there in our bodies. Yeah, be here now.

H:                     Exactly. And at the same time as you know it’s a journey, and it’s a challenge. And it takes time. And that brings me to another question, which is a difficult one in a sense. And that is– When you’re in a certain state where you feel disconnected. And when we feel disconnect, we don’t even know we feel disconnect. We just feel bad, or sad, or empty. And then you hear this, ‘Be present, be joyful, connect.’ And between you and that there seems to be an enormous distance, and it seems like something that isn’t even part of your reality. And among many things that cause this stage– And I call it a stage because it is a stage of the journey. You don’t have to stay there, but it’s a very real experience. And one of the main core blocks that prevent us from opening to who we is our feelings of unworthiness. How can we deal with feelings of unworthiness?

H:                     Would you like to– Would you be open to address this in some way? How do you deal with that? Can you even use aroma therapy with that?

T:                     Sure.

H:                     What do you do? How do you move from if you feel stuck in this feeling of ‘I’m lonely.’, ‘I’m worthless.’, ‘I’m nothing.’ To a state where “I am more than that. I can open to more than that.”

T:                     Yeah. Well, I think that you really addressed it already with the presence because that is, I think, the foundation of it. So– Yeah, that’s a hard one, and you said something about because we hear we’re supposed to present and joyful. And I think that it’s a myth, ‘I think that when you’re present, you’re joyful.’ Because sometimes when you’re fully present, you’re fully present with your grief -or your sadness, or your loneliness, or your anger. It’s all of those things that we try– In our culture we say, ‘Oh, all those things aren’t good so let’s not be those.’ But that is part of being fully present is feeling those things. And I found that the more present that I can be. The more connected that I can be– And I’m talking a root connection. A full body connection. And a connection to the Divine. The more you practice this level of awareness. So I have been personally in such deep depression that I will be contemplating my suicides and how I would do it. And there’s one in me that goes, ‘That’s a really good idea. That’s a good one.’ And then there’s this other part of me that almost floats above and sees her. And it really has so much compassion for this one in me that is hurting. But being fully present– So it’s an odd thing, but I’m feeling it. I’m right there. I’m fully in it. And I’m watching me in it. And just loving that poor soul that is going through this pain. Knowing that it is part of the process. It is part of this initiation. Because how could I possibly help somebody who is going through depression if I haven’t felt it, and really felt it, and been able to observe myself it feeling it? So I have to admit, I don’t love being in that place, but from time to time I go there, and I go in different ways to really feel. And I think that that is something that– The acceptance of it. And of course some say, ‘If you see yourself contemplating suicide or getting closer to it.’ Like in a ravine and go, ‘Okay, let’s not do this now.’ But to be able to hold yourself lovingly and compassionately for wherever you are. And be able to really go in and feel it and not be afraid of feeling it because we know– And I don’t know how this is, when I was younger, I thought that things would last forever. But now I’m realizing that, ‘Okay–‘, like you said, ‘This is just a phase. This is just one little part.’ But trying to push it away doesn’t make it go away. It just kind of prolongs it and makes it come back again. Because whether we like it or not, we’re going to have to process certain things in our life. And we can prolong it or we can go in and go, ‘Okay.’ It’s like walking up to the dragon and saying, ‘Okay, let’s do this.’ And it’s not always fun. And there are certain oils that can help to guide you through that process. 

T:                     I haven’t spoken about myrrh. And myrrh is a very important oil. So it’s the oil of Mother Earth. And I think that one in particular– And again, I’ll just add in here, if you’re pregnant, you’ll need to dilute. But people who are not pregnant are okay. So not everybody loves the smell of myrrh because it’s very earthy. It comes from a resin. But what it gives you the feeling of, for me, it really gives me that feeling of embrace. Like I’m being held. I’m being held by the Mother. Like she’s holding us right now. She’s holding us onto the planet right now. She’s always there. She’s always there to support us. And when we feel so disconnected from her, that’s when we feel like we’re flying off and we’re alone. But the truth is, we’re always connected to the earth. And using myrrh will stimulate that– that sense in us. On a cellular level, we’ll go, ‘Oh yeah, that’s right, she’s holding me like she always does. I’m not alone.’

H:                     Oh, this is so, so, so, so good. I thank you for this and for everything because this is such an important key for this specific life situation. Because when I have been interviewing with women who struggle with loneliness and also clients, the thing that I keep hearing is that it’s– Of course, ‘I feel alone.’ but also, ‘I do not feel supported.’ ‘This is what I miss the most.’ They don’t even mention no relationships as such that comes too… But the very feeling of being supported. And what you’ve just given us here is a way to find that support. And of course, it’s a different kind of support but it opens to that feeling of life supporting them. That is just wonderful.

T:                     Yeah. And I think that’s where a lot of us get challenged, me included. In the past, I have looked to other humans to give me what I needed. And the truth is, I have what I need and I have all the support I need from the Earth and from the Divine. And if I tap into that, then I can let these poor humans off the hook. Because you know how it is like trying to expect something out of somebody who doesn’t have. Like could you imagine a human trying to give me the same amount of power and energy as divine love? Or the Earth energy? I mean, we’re just humans. So yeah, it’s about really opening to that. And when we have that current going through us. When we have that line of energy moving from us. From the Earth through us and into the Divine. Then our communications with other humans is very different. And we don’t have that neediness– -that sort of wanting, it doesn’t exist anymore. We don’t expect it out of humans.

H:                     And then you can really attract support from other humans.  

T:                     Oh, yeah. Which is– Yes. A lot of what I help people with is just stop expecting other people to do that for you because it’s actually like repelling. When somebody is trying to take your energy for themselves and it’s like– Well, you know, when you hang around people who are energy vampires, you don’t want to be around them, right? So I teach people to not be– Well, in my book, I talk about faucets and drains. It’s like, be a faucet don’t be a drain. Don’t drain people.

H:                     Yeah. But also, just– You’ve been speaking so much about connection during our conversation. And that’s the key just as much. The more you can connect with the real source of love which really is within you, then you can start connecting with other people. It’s not that you have to do it all alone. We are wonderful connected. You just have to start with yourself and the gifts in the dark given to you. It’s just finding the way there. This has been so, so, so… Interesting isn’t even the word. That’s not the word– So rich and so inspiring.

T:                     I knew we were going to have fun!

H:                     Oh, you bet. And I know that our listeners will too. This is so wonderful. I could just keep asking questions, but we live on Earth, time is limited. So I have to just accept that I got just a bit of the abundance that you have to offer. We did– But I want to– I wanted to know, partly if there’s something you would like to add here at the end of our conversation? But also, I’m sure as our listeners have been listening to this conversation… What if they want to reach out to you? Or what offerings do you have for them, or what suggestions do you have for them? How can they reach you?

T:                     Okay, well let’s see. Oh gosh, so many things. Let’s see. Well, one would be whatever you got from today. Whatever you got inspired or awakened or anything that you learned from this little time together, please use it. That’s one thing that I always ask of anyone that I work with is that whatever you got take it out there, out into the world. And then use it to make the world a better place, coming from you.

T:                     And let’s see, to get ahold of me, my website, it’s just my name dot com. And also you can go to  It’s the same site. But I have on– Actually on my Tamara Gerlach, there’s a free e-book called Essential Radiance– No it’s not, it’s called Essential Presence.– Oh gosh, Essential Wisdom. Sorry.

H:                     It’s all the same.

T:                     Yeah, it’s radiance, presence, wisdom. Whatever, yeah, it’s essential anyway. But yes–

H:                     Sweet.

T:                     You can get that. Just a little quick think about how do you get into empty presence and raise your vibration. And so that’s a little fun read. And then coming soon on the Be Who You Are Academy, Robin Rice has put together some free courses and I’ll have– I believe mine is launching in June. And it’s about creating beauty fields. And it’s about how you create beauty fields in your environment but also within you. And that’s a really fun one. I’m really excited to launch that. And then coming with that is part of my– So I’m doing a Divine Body Wisdom series and one of those is “And the Men Came Running”. We were kind of joking, it’s a fun one. But it is about how do you raise your vibration in a way that it makes you attractive. And not attractive in a sexual way. But how do you attract– everything? In work environments, in relationships with your family and friends, and certainly in romantic relationships but it’s about how do you become that magnet for people. And we all know them, you know, those ones that walk into a room and light it up. And just learning how to embody that type of presence.

H:                     That sounds so exciting.

T:                     And that will be on Be Who You Are academy as well.

H:                     I look forward to it, that sounds so exciting. Wow.

T:                     Yeah.

H:                     You know you spoke on inspiration– And I did a funny thing just before this interview, I opened your book in a random place to find a quote that I could read at the end of it. And here it comes,

“Being inspired is not some form of magic. Nor a secret that we must learn. It is simply about believing in ourselves, and mostly not stopping ourselves from acting on our inspiration.”

Thank you, Tamara. This has been wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing your inspiration and your vibration and your beingness with us. It’s been just wonderful.

T:                     Oh, thank you. Thank you for having me, and thank you for all of the things that you do for so many people out in the world. I so appreciate you and your work. It’s really beautiful. Thank you.

H:                     Thank you. You make me blush. Thank you also everyone who is listening in! I know you feel inspired by this. I will be including all the resources and links that Tamara has mentioned so that you can just click in and find them. And as she said, keep on using this. Use this and enjoy it. It’s there for you. Thanks again, Tamara.

T:                     Thank you.  

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